According to one of our recent polls, 41 percent of women say they only occasionally push themselves out of their comfort zone.
That’s not exactly surprising—it’s called the comfort zone for a reason. But as we’ve all heard, growth happens when you step outside of it. That’s where a stretch mindset comes in.
A stretch mindset is the mental habit of purposefully seeking growth through discomfort, challenge, or risk. The goal isn’t to be fearless, but to keep trying, reflecting, and showing up for yourself.
Whether you’re reaching for something bigger at work or just hoping to feel more confident day to day, building a stretch mindset can help you keep moving forward. In this guide, we asked career coach Jess Wass to walk through the mindsets, habit challenges, and conversations that will help you stretch more often and feel confident doing it.
Read more: Mindset Boost! 8 Essential Phrases & Exercises for Implementing Positive Self-Talk
Get clear on why you're holding back from taking risks
Wass says ultimately, most of our resistance to leaving the comfort zone stems from a fear of failure.
“Many of us are risk-averse enough that we back away from an opportunity rather than risk not doing well. But growth happens in those challenge moments, and so does learning,” she says. “We think, ‘What happens if I don't succeed?’ And that comes from a fixed mindset. I realized several years ago I was plagued with a fixed mindset that left me scared to try new things, and it kept me from putting in effort to learn new skills and knowledge. I was hampering my own career as a result and keeping myself from growth.”
A fixed mindset is the belief that your abilities, intelligence, and talents are set traits—you either have them or you don’t. People with a fixed mindset tend to:
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Avoid challenges that might expose a weakness
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Give up easily or feel defeated by failure
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See effort as a sign that they’re “not good enough”
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Take feedback personally
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Feel threatened by the success of others
A growth mindset, on the other hand, is the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through effort, learning, and persistence. People with a growth mindset tend to:
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Embrace challenges as opportunities to grow
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Persist through setbacks
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See effort as essential to improvement
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Use feedback to get better
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Feel inspired by others’ success
If you have a fixed mindset, you’re more likely to avoid stretching yourself because failure feels like a reflection of who you are. But with a growth mindset, failure is just part of the process, and progress becomes more important than perfection.
Ask yourself this: “When was the last time I didn’t try something because I thought, ‘I’m not ready’ or ‘What if I fail?’” What would your mindset look like if you saw that as a learning opportunity instead?
Read more: Ask a Recruiter: I’m Scared to Take the Next Step in My Career. How Can I Overcome Fear?
Try a 7-day challenge to get more comfortable with growth
Repeated exposures to discomfort build confidence over time. If you feel ready to grow, try a week-long stretch challenge. One small push a day can help you build a growth mindset without overwhelming yourself. Here’s an example framework:
Day 1: Say yes to something new. Say yes to an invitation, task, or opportunity you’d normally hesitate on (e.g. joining a new meeting, going to an event in your community, grabbing coffee with a colleague you don’t know well, etc).
Day 2: Take a step on a stuck goal. Pick a project or idea you’ve been procrastinating on and make one move forward. It could be sending an email, opening a blank doc, or telling someone about your goals.
Day 3: Share an idea publicly. Voice your perspective in a meeting, leave a comment on a team doc, write a blog, or post something thoughtful on LinkedIn. Practice being seen and heard.
Day 4: Ask for feedback. Reach out to a manager, peer, or mentor and ask, “What’s one thing I could improve on right now?” or “How did I do on [specific task]?”
Day 5: Learn something outside your comfort zone. Spend 15–30 minutes learning about something that stretches your current skills (e.g. reading an article on a new topic, watching a tutorial, cooking something new, trying a new craft, shadowing someone on a different team, etc).
Day 6: Initiate a conversation. Speak up about something you’ve been avoiding, whether it’s setting a boundary, asking for support, or expressing interest in a new project.
Day 7: Reflect and reset. Give yourself credit for showing up and trying.
“At the end of the week, reflect on your week and identify three wins,” Wass says. “A win doesn't have to be a big action or end result, it can simply reflect positive progress, learning, or new opportunities.”
Ask yourself:
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What did I do this week that I’m proud of?
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What small risk did I take?
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What did I learn, even if it didn’t go perfectly?
“By giving weight to positive actions that happen throughout the journey instead of only valuing the end result, we can rewire our brains to be more positive and progress-oriented,” says Wass. “We are more comfortable taking risks when we know our worth and all the great things we have accomplished. When we don't do exercises like this, we often draw from an empty well of confidence. We don't know what we've accomplished or what is going well, so we feel like we can't risk not succeeding in the next activity.”
Small habits to get out of your comfort zone
Visualize your comfort zone like a bubble. You don’t have to leap outside of it, you can start by taking just one step to the edge. Tiny actions can lead to meaningful growth. Try these:
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If something feels intimidating, ease in with a draft, outline, or voice memo. The act of starting reduces fear.
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Do one thing differently every day. Change your route, ask a different question in a meeting, eat lunch with someone new, etc.
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Reach out to someone you admire or are curious about (coworker, manager, expert). Even just asking a question or sharing a compliment builds visibility.
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Break down a stretch goal into tiny next steps. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by the need to “network,” message one person. Instead of “launching a project,” simply start the first Google doc.
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When you feel resistance, ask, “What is this discomfort trying to teach me?”
How to prepare and advocate for a stretch assignment at work
A stretch assignment is a task or project that pushes you slightly beyond your current skills or comfort zone. Asking for one shows initiative and can lead to greater confidence, visibility, and career growth.
“Many people assume that management is paying attention to them and knows what they want. They convince themselves to sit and wait until someone taps them on the shoulder with an opportunity,” Wass says. “The reality is, if you want a new opportunity, if you want a new challenge, if you want that promotion, you have to clearly ask for it. Even when you say it, you might have to say it again.”
With her clients, she uses the movie Inception as a metaphor for how to approach stretch opportunities. “Your job is to plant the idea in your manager's head about what you want to do next. Let that idea take hold over weeks and months until an opportunity presents itself, and they suddenly connect the dots back to you. But you have to plant the seed first.”
How can you decide if you’re ready for a stretch opportunity in the first place? Wass says, “I like to use the 80/20 rule—80 percent of your life and work should be manageable and in a good place, while 20 percent can be changing and challenging. You need to stretch from a place of security and anchor or you will topple over. So do an inventory of what is going well, and if it feels like you are in a stable place, you’ll know you have the bandwidth to stretch and feel the discomfort.”
Ask yourself these questions to assess your stretch bandwidth:
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What parts of my work or life currently feel stable, manageable, or flowing well? (Think: routines, relationships, workload, emotional energy.)
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Where am I already feeling overwhelmed, overextended, or close to burnout?
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Do I feel like I have the mental and emotional capacity to take on something new or challenging right now? Why or why not?
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What support systems or habits do I have in place that would help me stay grounded while I stretch myself?
A script to initiate the conversation with your manager
“Start with what has been going well with your work,” Wass says. “Then, pause and ask if your manager has any feedback for you on what you could be doing better. Managers likely won't give you something new if there are a lot of things they think you need to currently work on. Make sure you have that awareness and can show improvement before asking for something more.”
You could say, “I’ve really been enjoying my work on [project/task], and I feel like I’ve made strong progress in [specific area or skill]. I’ve gotten positive feedback on [brief example], and overall, things have been going well. That said, I’d love to hear your perspective—do you have any feedback on how I’m doing or where I could improve?”
Wass says once you've asked for feedback and acknowledged how you can work on those areas, you can express that you’d like to continue to grow and develop and are hoping to work on a stretch opportunity. “It's important that you can share an example of the type of activities or projects that would feel like a stretch to you so you can be put on something you’re actually interested in. Be as specific as you can, while also leaving room for opportunities that you wouldn't know existed.”
You could say, “Thanks for the feedback, I’ll definitely keep working on those areas. I’m really focused on continuing to grow and would love to take on a stretch opportunity. One area I’m especially interested in is [specific skill, project, or responsibility] because I think it would challenge me and help me build [related skill or goal]. I’m also open to other opportunities where you think I could step outside my comfort zone or contribute in a new way. I’d love to hear your thoughts on where that might be possible.”
Lastly, Wass suggests asking for a follow-up conversation to be scheduled so you can check in on the topic. She says, “It's likely your manager might not have a new project for you right away. By scheduling a follow-up, it enables both of you to remember to keep this top of mind and to regularly discuss this idea of a stretch opportunity.”
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