Eighty-nine percent of women regularly feel some sort of anxiety heading into the workweek—a feeling termed the “Sunday Scaries” by many media outlets (including ours).
It’s hard to pinpoint who coined “Sunday Scaries,” and precisely when. But the phrase, which surfaced sometime around 2009, serves as a lighthearted slogan for the very real tension it represents.
To bring it back to reality, the Sunday Scaries is the anticipatory anxiety that people feel when heading into the workweek. It stems from overwork, burnout, toxic work environments, and even simply dreading the adultness of the workweek. For many who brace themselves for Monday morning, the feeling begins early Sunday and builds throughout the day, often ruining the end of a perfectly good weekend and, more poignantly, your precious free time away from work.
Unfortunately, there’s no magic cure-all for anxiety, but there are ways to cope. Recently, we asked women in our audience to share how they navigate the Sunday Scaries. The answers ranged in activity level from bed rotting to stress cleaning, but all seemed to tiptoe around one common desire: the illusion of control over something, be it our minds, our spaces, our bodies, or our futures.
Here’s how women say they keep the Sunday Scaries at bay—and how you can try their tactic for yourself.
7 ways women cope with the Sunday Scaries (& how to make each your own)
1. They immerse themselves in something else
“Binge-watching TV, not going out to do things on Sunday afternoon/evening.”
“Usually, I’ll read or watch an Asian drama. Both things help me focus on something else (figuring out the mystery in the book, reading subtitles and trying to keep track/enjoy what’s on screen).”
“I usually try to immerse myself in a hobby I enjoy.”
Try it: When combatting anxiety, sometimes your greatest headwind is your ability to sit still long enough to become immersed in something else. If that’s your challenge, start small. Watch one or two episodes of a sitcom like New Girl or Abbott Elementary or an internet fandom like Chicken Shop Date. Put on your favorite playlist and color for 30 minutes. Read for 20 minutes, then take a walk. As you ease into the idea of vegging out (yes, some people really do struggle with this), you can make the event even grander: add snacks, mood lighting, or commit to a movie marathon of a famous franchise. Secure this time for yourself.
2. They rest
“Do something enjoyable like hiking, prep for the week ahead, and unwind with a hot shower and book or movie before bed.”
“Don’t make myself leave the house, play games. Listen to music and cuddle my pets.”
“A weighted blanket to help me sleep.”
“Cuddle up with my cat, watch anime, and drink some wine.”
“Planning ahead, prepping meals, stretching, and giving myself an extra self-care–style night with a bath and a snuggle.”
Try it: Similar to a day spent binge-watching, a restful Sunday is all about being still, which can go against some people’s nature. You might feel lazy or unsettled, with constant to-do lists swirling through your mind. But in that constant state of activity or self-inflicted guilt, you’re downplaying a very natural need. Tiredness is your body’s response to over stimulation. When you feel worn out, soothe your anxiety by listening to what your body is saying. Trust it.
3. They schedule fun activities and socialize
“I try to plan something fun to do on Sunday. When I do, I notice that I'm focusing less on the ‘scaries’ and more on enjoying my weekend fully.”
“I schedule day hikes, swimming, kayaking, or other enjoyable outdoor activities on Sundays.”
“I choose a day during the week to connect and/or spend time with my friends—usually a Tuesday. It gives me something to look forward to and is a positive way to break up the work week.”
“Either by having a couple beers with friends or by having more of a self-care night—drinking tea, watching a movie, etc.”
Try it: Just as you can dread the future, the opposite can also be true: You can look forward to it. You have the power to make that happen with some gentle planning. Text a friend to go hiking this weekend, or carve out time Sunday morning to read in your favorite coffee shop. Put the activity on your calendar, even if just on your phone. Make it official, then make it consistent. Become the person who says, “I always make time for myself in this way on Sunday.”
4. They organize their life for the week ahead
“Writing everything down in a to-do list to tackle on Monday.”
“Prep Friday before I log off of work what my week ahead looks like.”
“I try to think through what's on my plate for the next day. I'll sometimes check my calendar if I'm not sure. Once I am assured of what is ahead, I can usually convince myself to relax.”
“Get to bed early, or clean up the house and do laundry to feel more organized and prepared.”
“Try to better prepare for Monday. Knowing what's coming up that week, making sure we have meals for each night, setting the coffee the night before, etc.”
Try it: The physical manifestation of anxiety might be your home or your inbox or that chair in your bedroom where you keep your laundry. Clean up your spaces—and your emotions—by spending a few minutes organizing. Whether it’s 15 minutes resetting your workspace, an hour prioritizing your work tasks for the week ahead, or a morning blasting your favorite playlist and actually putting away the laundry in that chair, creating structure in your life also creates boundaries around your peace.
5. They meditate or turn to spirituality
“Meditation helps calm the anxiety flare-ups. From there, planning ahead for how my Monday morning is going to go and sticking to it really helps.”
“Breathe and bring my thoughts back to the moment. Focus on ‘what is’ and not ‘what if.’ Be grateful.”
“Music playlists, random breathing exercises, and medicine as a last resort.”
“I usually go to church for spiritual nourishment and am able to face the week ahead.”
“Pray, long bath, and wine.”
Try it: Turn your anxiety into an opportunity for reflection and renewal by grounding yourself in the present moment and reframing your mindset. Both meditation and spirituality—whichever you prefer—can help you achieve this. Through meditation, you can calm racing thoughts and reconnect with your breath, countering anxiety with inner peace. Try a daily affirmation routine if this path resonates. Spirituality, whether faith or personal philosophy, can anchor you to something larger than daily woes, helping you to trust in your ability to navigate challenges.
6. They practice a positive mindset
“Remind myself that I can do this and have done it before. Do things to ground myself and be in the present.”
“Think about things I most want from the week—like things I want to accomplish at work but also things I want for myself, like to get good sleep or get in some workouts. Helps me have realistic goals and things to look forward to or be proud of.”
“Redirect my thoughts. I try to focus on something enjoyable I'm doing on Sunday instead of thinking about the next day. Remind myself to live in the now.”
“It's usually a matter of confidence to handle whatever arises. I work in a pretty dynamic and sometimes volatile environment. I just assure myself I have and can handle anything and the anxiety subsides.”
Try it: You might not be able to control whether the week goes haywire, but you can bolster your mindset. Practices like positive affirmations and journaling can remind you of your success and your strength. They can also infuse your day with joy. When you practice gratitude and finding humor, you build the tools to find positivity again and again, even in times of great stress… or on that inevitable moody Sunday.
7. They start looking for a new job
“I quit my job. The Sunday scaries got to the point where I couldn’t cope. I panicked so badly that I needed to get out of my toxic job.”
Try it: Sometimes, no matter how much you plan, prepare, self-soothe, or rest, your workplace is simply too toxic or too incompatible to be born and it’s time to leave. Check in with yourself on your values and your must-haves. Are you getting what you need career-wise? What about culturally? And how is your workplace impacting your ability to live your life? These are reasonable questions to ask yourself throughout your career, but most especially when you’re regularly spending your off-time worrying about your life on the clock. Find a company where you achieve your goals—all of them.
