Connecting as an Introvert: 10 Tips for Successful In-Person Networking

If you consider yourself an introvert, you might think you’re at a disadvantage when it comes to networking and other professional opportunities. Unlike extroverts, you may have a hard time putting yourself out there and the thought alone of giving your elevator pitch to dozens of strangers can be mentally exhausting. Maybe small talk doesn’t come to you easily or the nature of networking events feels awkward and contrived. 

But networking doesn’t have to be anxiety-inducing. There are ways to use your introversion to your advantage and simply play to your own unique strengths. 

If you know you’re drained by large social events, don’t go to the networking happy hour or the tradeshow convention. Instead, try connecting with smaller groups. Grab coffee with an old acquaintance whose career path you’re interested in or schedule a casual video chat with a recruiter. 

Crafting your own networking style is imperative for your career—networking helps you connect with interesting people, expand your circle, find niche opportunities, boost your confidence, learn the ins and outs of your industry, and so on. Let’s talk about what it really means to be an introvert, and learn the tips you need for networking at in-person events as an introvert so you can thrive among professional communities.

Read more: Networking Tips to Use When You Hate Networking

What does it mean to be an introvert at work?

In general, introverts get their energy by spending time alone or within small groups, whereas extroverts are energized by socialization and feel most comfortable in a large group setting. Introverted people thrive when they have time alone and have the ability to process things carefully. They tend to avoid conflict and impulsivity. 

But no two introverts are alike, just as no two extroverts are alike. For example, not all introverts are shy or suffer from anxiety—they’re not mutually exclusive. Some introverts aren’t terrified of networking events, they simply have to exert more of their social battery and mental energy than extroverts do. 

You can take personality tests to figure out where you fall on the introversion and extroversion spectrum, but here are some signs you might be more introverted at work:

• You’re a natural listener. You’re not the main speaking voice in meetings and you tend to allow others to lead the conversation.

• You prefer alone time. You can enjoy chatting and working in a group with your coworkers, but you work best when you’re in your own company.

• You consider things carefully. You don’t blurt out your immediate reaction or opinion to questions, you like to ruminate on things and formulate a thoughtful opinion in your head before sharing it with a group.

• You schedule more 1:1 meetings. When brainstorming or talking through a decision, you prefer to have facetime with just one or two people you feel comfortable with.

Read more: 20 Jobs for People Who Are Tired of People

10 tips for networking as an introvert

1. Build up your networking tolerance

Don’t put pressure on yourself to be a networking expert at your first event. Start by attending an event and getting acquainted with how networking events usually work. That way, you’ll be able to better prepare for future events when you actually want to connect with people. 

“Start with baby steps: Find an interesting event and simply attend,” says career coach Allie Villarreal. “This means no pressure to talk to anyone, no need to print out resumes or cards; simply attend the event with the goal of listening and learning. Often you will find everyone is happy enough to leave you alone while you still walk away with any and all learning you may have done. After that, build up your goals: ‘This time I will stop by one booth and give them my resume or I will raise my hand and ask one question after a talk,’ etc.”  

2. Do your homework and prepare

Reduce some of your event anxiety by preparing for the event. Brainstorm some casual talking points and icebreakers. If you’re able to, research some of the attendees beforehand and prepare some questions about their career, the event itself, and current trends in the industry. 

Try to connect with some of the attendees as well. Reach out on LinkedIn and send them a simple message like, “I’m looking forward to meeting you at X event!” And of course, prepare some fun facts about yourself and brainstorm potential answers to questions about your career trajectory and background. Having fun facts is vital—people are more likely to remember that you’ve lived in 10 states rather than the fact you were nervous at the event.

Read more: 8 Effective & Memorable Ways to Introduce Yourself Professionally (with Examples)

3. Set specific goals for yourself

What do you want to get out of the event? Write down a few goals for yourself. How many people do you want to connect with? How long do you want to stay? Is your goal to find a job lead or simply have good conversations with new acquaintances? Regardless of your specific goals, try not to sneak out the back door immediately. If you start to panic, take a breath, remind yourself why you’re there, and push yourself to stay for at least half of the event. 

4. Start your day with affirmations

Affirmations are quick one-liners that reinforce positive thoughts about yourself. The morning of a networking event, repeating affirmations or writing them down can help you feel empowered and accepted and remember what’s important to you. 

Set the tone of your day with one of these positive affirmations:

• “I’m an introvert that doesn’t always like socializing, and that’s completely okay.”

• “I’m not perfect at networking, but I’m working on improving every day.”

• “I have surpassed my own expectations in the past.”

• “There are a million reasons to be proud of myself.”

• “I am better than I was yesterday.”

• “I have every quality I need to achieve success.

5. Bring a networking partner

One option for networking as an introvert is to bring a trusted friend or colleague with you. This doesn’t mean secluding yourselves in the corner for the whole event. Instead, when you start feeling overwhelmed, you can rely on your partner as a comforting safety net—someone who can break the ice, support you in a conversation, advocate for you, and simply be there for you to help you relax. 

6. Scope out the space

When you arrive at the event, take stock of the entire area—is the event in one large, open room? Are there booths with high-top tables for standing conversations or smaller rooms with sit-down tables? Are there areas where you can go recharge for a bit? Where are the restrooms if you need a quick escape?

You can find 1:1 or small group opportunities to network at any event. Talk to someone standing in line for the coffee, ask your neighbor what they want to learn when the conference presenters are setting up, or introduce yourself to the person you walked in with at the same time.

7. Find and engage with the other introverts

You’re probably not the sole introvert at any given event. When you’re scoping out the space, make sure you look for other introverts. Chances are, you might have a good read on how they’re feeling and you probably have a good shot at engaging them in a more intimate conversation. Once you get to know the basics, connect with them on a deeper level and ask them more impactful questions like, “I’m really curious about how artificial intelligence is going to impact journalism. I’d love to hear more about your thoughts on AI and where you want your company to be in five years.” 

8. Ask good open-ended questions

People love talking about themselves. If you’re an introvert, you can prepare a list of open-ended, thought-provoking questions to get people talking and take some of the pressure off of you. 

Everyone is going to be asking the basics like, “Where do you work?” or “What’s your job?” So, try asking these alternative questions instead:

• What brings you to this event?

• Are you currently in the field or looking to break into it?

• What are you hoping to get out of today?

• How could someone hoping to join your organization make themselves stand out?

• If you could give one piece of advice for someone trying to follow in your footsteps, what would it be?

• What are one or two skills that you believe set you apart or allow you to thrive in this space?

Read more: The Best Icebreaker Questions for Work Events

9. Be an active listener

Here’s where you can embrace your introversion and use it to your advantage. Chances are, if you’re an introvert, you’re a good listener. Body language and active listening are skills you definitely want to utilize as an introvert. Nod while they’re speaking, smile, and show interest in what others are saying. When you affirm what they have to say, you’ll build better relationships. 

10. Follow up with new connections after the event

The networking doesn’t stop once you walk out the door, you have to follow through and make connections online. Luckily, emails are an introvert’s friend. Send a quick follow-up email or message on LinkedIn to expand on your thoughts even further. 

Write an email asking to spend more 1:1 time with them: 

Or, write an email asking them if there’s anyone else they can connect you with:

11. Reward yourself

After the event, make sure you reward yourself for getting out of your comfort zone. Whether it’s watching an old film, ordering takeout, or having a self-care night, give yourself a well-deserved rest. Reflect on your day and all of the things that went well and what you could do better next time. It can only go up from here!